Category Archives: Wish I Was Here

Sep16

Let the editing continue!

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Let the editing continue!

I got the formatted copy of Wish YOU Were Here from the publisher and was given two weeks to check it over one more time.

Before this, I stressed over making changes for the final-final draft. After I turned that in, I was told to send in another copy if I made any further changes by whatever date it was. (Making a mental note to remember that’s an option when I’m stressing over Book 3.)

I waited until the day before this new date to look at my final-final draft because I never learn. Did I make changes? Yep! A bunch of them but didn’t have time to make it through the entire book. That bugged me.

But now I have a chance to make final-final-final changes, which meant repeated texts to Mark on a Saturday night, interrupting the MarTar Manor cards and cocktails tradition with my quibbling over commas and “in” vs. “into.”

It could have been super annoying, I’m sure, but Mark seemed to take it with aplomb. He even showed me a pic of what was spinning on the record player–Stone Temple Pilots. (I approved.) And I showed him a picture of my laptop with a shot glass of peanut butter whiskey propped dangerously above the keys. (He approved. Maybe not of the recklessness, but of the drink choice.) And this is why we’re friends.

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Sep6

Ilsa goes back to school

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Ilsa goes back to school

The picture and caption I posted on socials:

I didn’t plan on being a teacher, except for martial arts, but when the school had a need for a second grade science teacher, I said I’d do it. My dear mother said: “Wow, good for you!” Then: “Do you know second grade science?” Love the confidence. I think I’ll manage. Thanks.

Then everyone’s favorite Royal Highness immediately texted:

This is just one class twice a week, and I wasn’t too concerned about second grade since I’d subbed that grade several times last year.

At that point, however, I’d been used to middle schoolers. Little kids are a different species. I didn’t know the cutesy tricks the lower grade teachers use like, “Quiet Coyote” and “One, two, three, eyes on me,” to which the students respond, “One, two, eyes on you.”

Who comes up with this stuff?

But before my appointed day with the littles, I sat with their teachers at lunch to get advice, explaining I was nervous since I only knew middle school. They said, “Ohhh! Middle school! Those kids are scary.”

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Aug18

Much ado about writing

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Much ado about writing

My apologies to those who are only into this blog for the Jiu-Jitsu, all two of you.

I’m finally breathing again now that I’ve turned in my final draft of Wish YOU Were Here, the sequel to Wish I Was Here. I’ve also been sewing together pieces of Book 3, Wish We Weren’t Here, and reviewing audiobook drafts of Book 1.

I had plenty of time to work on Book 2 and wasn’t stressing it much, thinking it would be a cinch. But when it comes to editing, knowledge isn’t power, it’s added frustration.

Some things are simple to correct. You don’t need “very,” “really,” “even,” just,” and oftentimes “that.” I eliminated those. They are just really very much unneeded. I’m not sure how they got in there in the first place, aside from me writing like a normal human.

Same goes for filler words such as, “There was/were” and “It was/were.” An example: “There was no one around” becomes “No one was around.”

Another tip: You don’t need “and then.” One or the other will do.

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Jul28

Back to our regularly scheduled program

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Back to our regularly scheduled program

In other words, I went back to Jiu-Jitsu Saturday morning after my surgery on Monday. The doctor had warned, “Nothing more than a stationary bike. Don’t get your blood pressure up.”

I don’t have a stationary bike, so I basically got slothful for several days. Feeling my muscles shrink and my stomach sag, I at least did a set of push-ups Friday. My nose throbbed afterward, however.

Oh well. It’s been too long since I’d Jiu-Jitsued it up, so I donned my gi and fresh nose Band-Aids and headed to the mixed beginner (Combatives) and advanced (Master Cycle) class.

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May20

Ich wünschte ich wäre hier

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Ich wünschte ich wäre hier

I could also say: Ojalá estuviera aquí.

And soon it will be: [whatever “Wish I Was Here” is in French].

The publisher asked authors if they’d like their Kindle e-books translated into German and Spanish.

“Sure!” I said. “Why not?”

“They’ll be up within 72 hours,” was the response.

Clearly, that means they’re AI-generated. I hope the robots did a good job. Not that humans can’t make mistakes, of course. In fact, as well-refined as AI has become, maybe it did a better job than a human could. Still, some carbon-based life form proofreading after the fact would probably be prudent. I’d like to say I could do it, but…

Conozco ein bisschen Español y Deutsch pero nein Français. And certainly not enough of the first two to be a decent judge.

If anyone wants to 1) test their foreign language knowledge, 2) help out a blog buddy, and 3) enjoy a good book, especially as a fun summer read, try Wish I Was Here in the lingua of your choice! [Click/tap See all languages and editions then choose a language from the drop-down menu. It’s only $6 or free if you have Kindle Unlimited. Yes, I have an affiliate link, FWIW.]

Other ways my book goes international

The Travel Architect emailed me a pic of my book on her lap at the airport as she awaited a flight to Copenhagen.

“Oooh! Send me a pic of it at cool places,” I requested.

A couple of days later, I received an email titled Malmo City Library, Sweden.

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Mar25

Where my mojo at? And some book stuff.

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Where my mojo at? And some book stuff.

I’ve been back at Jiu-Jitsu for three months but am still discouraged by the slow climb to where I was before my foot broke.

Sometimes I wonder if I should stay home, watch TV, and eat garbage with Hubby instead of go to class.

Sometimes I’m just tired and not feeling it.

Sometimes I go anyway.

Then I find myself smiling and fist bumping the friendly students who greet me and ask how I’m doing.

Class begins and Her Royal Highness and I get the giggles over our inability to properly execute the moves. I’m grateful that, rather than be annoyed, Instructor laughs with us. I consider whether he’d be so amiable if it had been me with someone other than his wife.

I had somehow managed to throw her on her back while flipping myself over on my head rather than over my shoulder. It’s a wonder I didn’t hurt my neck, but since that’s not a lower extremity, it was fine. Later squashing my toe and needing to ice it after class is par for the course, however.

Bruises on upper extremities are still fair game.

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Feb11

I make people lose sleep.

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I make people lose sleep.

I gambled with sending Herb an early pdf of Wish I Was Here so he could review it.

Herb: “I will give you a review that will be fair and honest.”

Me: “I really, really hope you like my book, or I may regret this!”

Fortunately, the bet paid off.

TWO DAYS after I sent him a pdf, he responded: “Okay, that was worth doing. I will definitely have good things to say in a review when the time comes. It was a great concept and well-written, even though I don’t know that I’m the target demographic for it. It held my interest and kept me turning pages right to the end, so much so that I stayed up late to read it.”

I was so relieved. Here’s his review:

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Feb1

How is this my life?

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How is this my life?

Another post already?! Yep! A rare “double header” from Ilsa.

I wanted to touch on that other half of my blog’s title for those of you who care more about news from the writing front.

Listening to a draft for my AUDIOBOOK!!!

Let’s just take a moment to let the fact that there will be an audio version of Wish I Was Here in the world, and how cool that is, sink in.

Okay. Now continuing…

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Jan22

Big news! New cover!

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I’ll tell you right now that the moral of this story is it pays to complain advocate for yourself.

I was told ads for my book were running. I had paid for those ads, so I asked the new orders lady I had befriended if she could get a hold of them to send me.

She did. One ad was just a “Quote Card” with my book cover and a reviewer’s blurb. That was fine, I guess.

The other two had good wording, but the AI images of the people looked like children, not 18-year-olds. I felt this was misleading and confusing to the viewer.

I pondered. I waited. Then I acted. I harnessed my newfound friendship with Orders Lady to see if she would advocate on my behalf. This morning she reported that my ads were on the docket for the company’s weekly meeting. They discussed it at length, and it was now in their hands.

I thanked her and let it go for the time being. Then maybe an hour later, I got an email from the publisher himself informing me that they’d run a full audit on my ads, which hadn’t done well [shocker] and the Amazon page. He believed the problem was the cover, so he sent me a new design he’d like to start using immediately.

“Let me know what you think!” he said.

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Jan17

“Your armpit needs to eat my toes.”

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It’s been a while since I’ve heard a great #OnlyInJiuJitsu line, and that one certainly qualifies. HRH was reminding me how to do a footlock, not remotely hiding her disbelief that I couldn’t remember.

It’s really depressing, though not surprising, how much I’ve forgotten. Feeling like a brand new student to Master Cycle rather than a bonafide kick butt warrior blue belt* like I once was, is a bummer. *Quiet, HRH. It’s how I felt, okay!?!

When I woke up Saturday morning for the 8:30 class and noted that HRH had messaged me at 12:03 am, I was concerned that she wouldn’t be making it to class with me. Sure enough, she had no babysitter. I would have to brave the boys class solo.

When it was time to partner up that morning, I hung back, letting the dudes do their duding. Instructor, being conscientious of the situation, paired me with Crockett. I was relieved. I did at least know him from before I left, though he was still in the class below mine then. Otherwise, partnering for the first time with a stranger is always a little awkward. Remember that Li’l Trejo incident?

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