May30

Here’s something I didn’t tell you

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Here’s something I didn’t tell you

Remember that time I got dressed up to meet Sensei at the library for zucchini? It wasn’t just for zucchini. We were plotting and scheming a Taekwondo class at my kids’ school.

Here’s the thing: everyone in my family is a Taekwondo black belt except Little Joe. That makes me sad for him. When my daughters and I did Taekwondo, we were Sensei’s last students before he essentially retired.

I’d like to argue that, since the very last black belt he handed out was to me, he broke the mold. How could anyone top that? But I pulled him out of retirement to help me start this class.

As a quick refresher of my post, Because I go to stupid lengths for humor, I had decided to forgo my usual ratty clothes by wearing my fanciest dress for a library meeting. At our next meeting, Sensei, who likewise typically arrives in the same red sweat pants and yellow or blue T-shirt, attempted to show me up.

Sensei dressed up. And he brought more zucchini. Of course.

I had considered he might do this, so I didn’t laugh. He also didn’t laugh when I was all dolled up, but he told me Mrs. Sensei did when he relayed the story. Likewise, when I told Hubby about the above, he laughed.

At least our efforts entertained each other’s spouses.

He also drove his fancy one-of-only-30-or-something-or-other Acuras designed by some race car driver. I don’t know. You can Google it. I wasn’t paying that close attention. [I wrote that to make Mrs. Sensei laugh, if she reads this, and Sensei scowl, if he reads this.]

Being the punk that I am, I first said, “What, no tie?” He said, “I knew you were going to say that.” I didn’t go so far as to put on lipstick for him, so I guess we’re even. He removed the suit jacket with relief once I got through the business of taking pictures for the blog. Apparently, we’ll both go to extra lengths for you guys.

I brought Sensei on for Taekwondo because I didn’t trust my ability to teach it on my own.

Sensei pow-wow at the school. My daughter also helped when she could.
Me calmly waiting to be elbowed in the face.

At least Sensei got one more crack in because after the first semester, I said, “I’ve got this now. You can go back to your day job.” I realized I could totally do this, and I imagine he didn’t mind not having to drive all the way out to my kids’ school on Friday afternoons.

I added relay races, which the kids loved. I sneakily began teaching them the form they needed to learn by doing the moves as warm up drills–making the form easier to nail down later on. And we occasionally played “Sensei Says” instead of Simon Says to get them practicing different blocks, kicks, etc.

In other words…

Much like the girls’ self-defense summer camp, teaching these kids has been a joy, despite the many third grade boys. The nose picking and arm-pit farting wasn’t something I’d dealt with while teaching the girls. Imagine that. But I have whipped these kids into more mature, appropriate shape.

One parent, observing from the back, said to Hubby, “It looks like she’s training a school army.” Thank you, kind sir.

At the end of the school year, I felt oddly jittery on testing day, remembering how incredibly stressed I was for testing, especially the first one. It was weird to be on the other end of that for a change, but it made me sympathetic to the shy, nervous kids.

I tried to remain neutral for each student, just saying, “Thank you. You may be seated,” as they finished. However, one kid blew me away with how well he did, so I inadvertently clapped for him. Oops.

So I’m happy to announce my first wave of orange belt students. I can’t show pictures of minors, so this image will have to do.

If you’ve done martial arts, you may be thinking, “I thought yellow was next.” Yes, normally, but I learned it as orange then yellow, so that’s how I’m doing it too.

Handing these out was a proud moment for me. One mom told me how much her son enjoys the class, adding that he’s a shy kid, so this has boosted his confidence. (This was the kid who did so well.) Another mom said her kids love the class because they love me. Awwhh!

Unlike when I was a student, I did not require these kids to bring food for the belt ceremony. I had enough sympathy jitters for testing. I can’t imagine the vicarious anguish I’d have for their baking trials. (If you’ve been reading me long enough, you know.)

So, one year down, and hopefully more to go.

Last Q: Not only does this group with a number-three hit in 1999 like girls who wear Abercrombie & Fitch, but Chinese food makes them sick. A: LFO

I hadn’t heard that song, so I looked it up. Talk about sticking in your mind. I had a hard time shaking that one out.

New Q: What is the capital of Bangladesh?

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52 responses »

    • Ah, sorry. But that’s so neat you have a TKD black belt too! A couple of parents have asked how long ago I got mine. I say, “Two years ago. I was a late bloomer.” Even still, I hope I can remember everything. Fortunately, my young, still malleable-brained daughters were with me and can probably help. You’re working on new skills and different belts now. 🙂

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  5. Your “answer” had me scratching my head. Even googling wasn’t doing anything, since that stands for Low-Frequency Oscillator. It wasn’t until I put in “what is the band lfo known for” that I got anywhere. A boy band. Now that is one answer I am downright proud to not have known 😉

    I’m with you about the car. Does it work? Will it start when I turn the key? Good enough! just get me from point A to point B and we’ll call it a win.

    Little boys are revolting. I was a little boy once and I still think they are 😉 Thankfully, I have found that most of them grow out of it. But not all, hahahaha.

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    • I’m pleased to not have known about LFO either, Booky. And I agree about the car. I have low standards. Ours are all cheap and used. My daughter recently wrapped the side of our family van around the cart return pole at Costco, leaving a sizable dent. Fortunately, it was the door that wasn’t good at closing anyway since now it won’t open. It looks terrible but doesn’t bother me. The thing still runs. I don’t like the idea of having a car I care about and then would worry about. We should be detached from objects.

      I think you’re right about boys. I was talking to a teacher the other day, and he interrupted me with, “You just said ‘do-do,'” with a smirk and a chuckle. Wow. 😛

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      • Hahahahahaahaha! I can laugh because I’m not dealing with that teacher. If I was, I’d scowl at him menacingly and tell him to grow up and stop being an immature jackass.
        That is why (among many reasons) I am not in a people oriented line of work 😉

        I have never had a new car and even the “newest” I’ve owned was/is 10 years old. My coworker is a car guy and my goodness, he’ll go on for 10’s of minutes at a time about something or other. I’ve learned to just go “oh, ok, hum, well what do know, interesting” and that seems to be enough 😀

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      • Fortunately, this teacher has earned many points with me, and I know he has young kids, so I’ll give him a pass. As to your coworker, I would give him my spiel about cars being nothing more than useful tools. Who cares? And maybe that would shut him up. Then again, I could go on about martial arts, and he might say, “It’s just weird movements. Who cares?” and that would be fair. I’m glad you’re being polite. 🙂

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  6. you crack me up, love the showdown/show up/show off meetup at the library! so cool you’re doing this class, i’m sure all of the kids love it and you’re patient because you know what it feels like to be on their side. no clue about the music at all )

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  9. Plotting to take over the world? again? A student army can be very powerful, but sooner or later they are going to want snacks. They’re loyalty to you might depend on it … just say’n …

    I thought of taking a martial arts class in high school, but then I broken my finger playing flag football and decided I’d rather be a wimp than be in pain. Then changed my mind when I became a security guard and took batton training so I could defend myself — just before running, tripping, falling and breaking another finger on the job. Me and my batton got assigned to the radio desk after that …

    sigh …

    and Dhaka.

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    • Haha. Want snacks. Man, oh man. I can never keep a straight face when reading your comments, Andrew.

      Thank you for getting the finger breaks covered for the two of us. I’ll do injuries to the bottom half of the body, you take top, and perhaps together we’ll satisfy the universe’s demands.

      And here I thought maybe, just maybe, I’d stump you on the trivia, but, I came to your comment, saw the bottom, and scowled saying, out loud, “Of course he still got it.” 😛 🙂

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  10. The activities today’s kids get into are SO much better than those from previous generations. All I remember from back then was cotillion (which can only be described as a real-life nightmare). My granddaughter (eight young years) already had her first training session in parkour. Like your students it doesn’t matter how good she gets but more that she can just say she’s doing it. Instant cool factor. As for the trivia, I had no intention of looking it up but I was impressed with how confidently Andrew answered. He strikes me as one who would know that sort of thing off the top of his head.

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    • Andrew should go on Jeopardy, and then share his winnings with his blog buddies. I’m not sure he’s ever been wrong.

      Parkour is super cool. That’s fun for her. Could you imagine if I took that up, with my propensity for leg, ankle, foot injuries? Would be really fun, though.

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  13. Awww…this makes me nostalgic for Alex’s karate days. He learned Pangai-Noon karate for several years–making it to a brown belt before saying, “Hey! I want competition swimming now!” I still made him keep all his belts.

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  16. What a wonderful experience both for the students and for you too. A nice full circle moment! 💕 And I had to love and laugh how you and Sensei go out of your way for a good laugh at each other’s expense!

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  18. I could’ve taken advantage of the Married Clause and asked Tara about Bangladesh, but I’m 99% sure her answer would have been, “I have no freakin’ idea.” Neither did I. But weirdly, I have a large contingent of Bangladeshian followers, so if any of them also read you, I’m sure they were screaming the answer out loud.

    Pretty bitchin’ ride Sensei has there.

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  19. Pingback: Five rounds of trivia with lucky #20. – Mark My Words

  20. Pingback: Five rounds of trivia with lucky #20. – Mark My Words

  21. Martial art you win or loose according to rules you play or fight… wish life some rules and rulers…there are far many things we will never answered, how kangroo came into existence, panda why was it engineers, dogs were better of without chain…geeta based economy has this flaw…we lost and forgot to life and living…

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