It was time to roll. Instructor turned on music.
And I started dancing.
Typically, for this to happen, I have to be very comfortable with the people around me. So me dancing at Jiu-Jitsu… What the heck was that?!
For starters, it was, at best, some weird kick thing reminiscent of Elaine from Seinfeld.
The class started, as usual, with Mrs. Instructor and me partnering together. Also, as usual, we struggled to remember the moves. I’m generally inclined to watch other groups and try to figure it out from them, but Mrs. Instructor is, for some strange reason, NOT afraid of the instructor, as though she’s perfectly comfortable with him or something.
“I’m raising my hand,” she said.
Fiiiiinnneee.
Instructor joined us, but then Surfer Dude (SD) arrived, so Instructor helped his wife and assigned SD to me. That was all good.
Then Instructor introduced our next move, a “bear roll.”
You reach one hand through the other person’s knees, the other hand under their back, grab their wrist with both hands, get a strong stance, bend, lift, flip. Voila!
I looked at SD with one eyebrow raised.
Since Tess’s departure to the other side of the country, I’ve had a running gag going in our JJ Ladies text group, frequently implying that Tess will be present at whatever get-together we plan.
I’ll say things like, “Tess, when does your flight arrive? I’ll pick you up.”
I used it recently when trying to plan a karaoke night. When we moved the date, I wrote: “Tess, I hope you can avoid a change of flight fee.”
Then it was, “Who wants to join Tess and me at karaoke?”
This made Tess laugh and “Pink” say, “I love how you keep sneaking Tess in there.”
Karaoke night never came to fruition, but that didn’t stop me from having a little fun.
I discovered this in my drafts folder from August.
The below is from July 3, and it took about a year to scroll to find it. Apparently Mrs. Instructor and I chat a lot. Mine is the writing in purple.
More recently, I wrote to her, “Uncontrollable loud sustained laughter during a wall drill with Instructor. Super embarrassing.”
Her: What happened?
Me: I don’t know! I just couldn’t stop!
Her: lol
Me another day:
I received this message a little bit ago:
First of all, aren’t you a subscriber so you get notified when there IS something here and don’t need to keep checking? (Take note, all of you.)
Second, I’ve been swamped with work and authorly stuff, like bio, acknowledgements, finding other authors to write blurbs, etc. [Check, check, and check, but those were the easy items.]
Third, this means I’ve been ignoring all other blogs, and I feel guilty when I post here but don’t visit others.
But the above message is what I get for telling Mrs. Instructor I had a post waiting in the wings called “The One About Mrs. Instructor.” Some people just love seeing their name in lights blogs. So, without further ado…
Warning: I chronicle my Jiu-Jitsu Journey here. This is a low moment post. If you’re not in the mood to be brought down, just skip to the end.
I wasn’t in the best frame of mind when I arrived for Jiu-Jitsu. Because of other life stressors, my normal place of refuge has lost its euphoria. But I’m trying to push through.
I showed up for a mini-Reflex Development class, where Master Cycle students are encouraged to help the Combatives students. Instructor seemed glad I was there and eager for me to assist him in demonstrating the moves.
Okay, friends. After lulling you into a false sense of security with posts related to baking, beeping, and random food pics, I’m bringing Jiu-Jitsu back in force! (I just heard Mrs. Instructor quietly say, “Yay.”)
In a recent class, Instructor used the Combatives Belt Kid (CBK) as his demo partner. I thought of telling CBK later, “Hey, man, good for you. What an honor.”
But in last night’s class, Instructor used me as his demo partner, so I now realize it’s a matter of who’s sitting closest or randomly makes eye contact, rather than a matter of skill. [Note to self: Sit far away and avoid eye contact as though Instructor is Kaa from The Jungle Book or the basilisk from Harry Potter.]
Being demo partner in Master Cycle is frightening. Thankfully, the moves here are sort of a crap shoot. Some are ridiculously complicated, but a lot are really quite simple when you get down to it.
While I was doing triangle chokes in Reflex Development with Iceberg, Surfer Dude was watching.
“Where do you have your foot?” he asked me.
I looked. “Oh, it’s on his knee. It should be on his hip. Sorry. That was lazy of me.”
“You’re in Master Cycle now,” he reminded me, and continued reminding me as he pulled no punches when we rolled together later. “I want you to be as good at triangles as I am.”
“Whoa,” I said, kind of flattered at his apparent faith in me, since he is the king of triangles. “New life goal.”
Next SD helped Iceberg properly triangle choke me.
“When her face starts turning red like that, you know you’re getting it,” SD told him.
“Thanks, man. Appreciate it,” I said. He smiled.
In another Master Cycle class (my apologies to those I confused about that), I partnered with The Combatives Belt Kid. He started by congratulating me on the new belt. What a polite young man.
Then I uppercut him in the jaw.
To be fair, it was an ACCIDENT! And it was rather light. His braces didn’t cut his mouth or anything.
I apologized, he smiled, said “It’s okay,” then, “Would you like to try again?”
So that time I DID make him bleed.
Kidding, kidding. I did the move properly, no blood involved.
When we switched partners, he told “Pink” I had punched him. She said to me, “That’s okay. I’ve frequently made his nose bleed.”
See? I’m a lamb!
Also while rolling with The Combatives Belt Kid (CBK, anyone?), I tried a cross choke.
“I feel really bad that I’m actively trying to hurt you,” I said. It seriously felt wrong. But he got away by rolling over his head somehow. It was rather impressive.
“You almost got me, though,” he was kind enough to tell me. “It was really close. [Long pause.] I need a minute.” We waited for the flow of blood to return to his brain.
Why aren’t more people into this stuff???
So, you would think since Mrs. Instructor and I are friends, we’re both female, I’m new to Master Cycle, and given that the guys are nice and easy on me, she would be too, right?
Wrong!
That chic’s leg hooks were SOLID. I feel like 75% of the time I’m able to slip a choke. She was all, “Oh, you want to slide out by getting your back to the ground? Let me just pull you back on top of me as though you weigh approximately 7.5 pounds.”
“You got a frame in on the right side? That’s cool, I’ll just fling you over to the left and sink the choke in with that arm.”
Daaaaaaannnnnggg. Such fierceness!
Basically, I didn’t stand a chance.
Writing and Martial Arts 