Category Archives: Uncategorized

And she’s back!

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Did you miss me? Don’t answer that.

Did you notice I was gone?

Don’t answer that, either.

Remember months ago when I said I needed to take a blog break to work on my book? That didn’t really end up happening. I just couldn’t stay away. August 31 was my deadline, however, so I used this last month to really knuckle down. And it’s done! Hooray!

There are few things more stressful than hitting the send button when turning in a manuscript.

I’m excited about this book. It was originally “If You Keep Perfectly Still, Maybe They Won’t See You,” eliciting the image of being stalked by a T-Rex. The first Jurassic Park film taught us Tyranosaurs have poor eyesight, but see movement. It was an instructional film. The publisher felt that title was too long, however. Now we have: Be a Happier Parent or Laugh Trying.

I guess that works, too, even if it contains no practical wisdom for T-Rex attacks. Read the rest of this entry →

The ants go marching 50 by 50. Hurrah! Hurrah!

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We were gone for a week. In our absence, half the ants in California moved in. With complete disregard for squatters’ rights, we annihilated (ant-ihilated?) them.

There were concentrations in the usual places with a few scouts checking out the living arrangements in other rooms. When I changed Joe’s diaper, one climbed in. I removed it, not knowing for whom the situation was worse: Joe for having a literal ant in his pants, or the ant itself, considering Joe had soiled four diapers that day and appeared to be on a roll.

The most curious and concerning area of discovery was our freezer. The integrity of our door closing system is clearly suspect. The ants didn’t get far, however. I discovered them splayed across a package of frozen chicken near their apparent entrance. The silly creatures ventured forth across a frozen fowl tundra with nary a jacket. Read the rest of this entry →

The hidden glamorous side of motherhood

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My friend with three sons posted this on facebook:

Life as the Activities Director at Camp Mommy is seldom dull. Overheard this morning:

Boy 1 – “What should we do?”

Boy 2- “Let’s all get in the closet and fart. Last one standing wins.”

I’m glad I have three girls. Although, today the youngest said, Read the rest of this entry →

Buried by animals

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Joseph’s sisters were having fun with him and their stuffed animals.

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He doesn’t seem to mind.

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Getting a little higher…

Read the rest of this entry →

The chicken has landed

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Four chickens, to be exact. As you may recall, our coop was smaller than expected, so Husband constructed a “chicken run” to give our birds a little more free range.

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My youngest daughter has become one with the chickens. She spends time playing in their yard daily.

Backing up a bit, we planned to buy our chickens from the same store we bought the other supplies. Only those chickens were $20 each. I was like, uh, no. That price is fowl. (Thank you. I’ll show myself out.)

A quick craigslist search found me chickens nearby for $7 each. I called up the owner to confirm the price and that they were old enough to tell the hens from the roosters. I hung up with a triumphant smile.

Hubs was less confident. Read the rest of this entry →

Summer jobs

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Every summer we come up with a new chore chart for our kids. This year maybe we’ll just follow this one someone sent me.

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Which is your favorite age-appropriate chore?

“Tell us a story!”

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My husband gets this from our girls frequently at bedtime, even though I just read to them and it’s past their bedtime. This is how he responded tonight. Read the rest of this entry →

Another husbandism

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“Today was pretty low key.

So yesterday was Thor.

Which is ironic because today Read the rest of this entry →

Tooth Fairies Welcome

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A quick note to show you this. My daughter made a path for the tooth fairy from the doorway to her pillow. Do you think the tooth fairy will miss it?

DSCN5116A lot of predators along the way. It’s more like running the gauntlet. Or rather, flying. Read the rest of this entry →

Bits and Bobs

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No actual Bobs were hurt or thought about during the writing of this post. Shoot. Now I just thought of one. I hope he’s okay.

I was reciting spelling words to my ten-year-old. One of the words was recurring. She wrote it twice. On purpose. Clever girl.

This is the same girl who, six years ago, was in a narrating kick. She once said, “Lucy is walking, walking, walking. Lucy is leaving the room.” (Thank goodness.)

There’s a man who periodically comes to the door asking if he can cut branches off our eucalyptus tree. I think he said his sister uses them in her florist shop. Since the tree grows like a weed and we occasionally have to have it professionally trimmed, I’m always happy to let him.

This time he said he’d be right back after picking his kids up from the school around the corner. When he was gone for a long time I worried he’d changed his mind. Finally there was a knock on the door. The man’s young son was standing there with a bouquet of flowers.

“My mom said to give these to you.”

I thanked him and told him to pass along the thanks to his wonderful mom. I neglected to Read the rest of this entry →