Long-time readers know this person. Some may have read the title and known right away who this post would be about. (If you did, let me know in the comments. Now I’m curious.)
I was doing a free gym trial, figuring it would be a good way to rebuild leg muscle, when I ran into an old friend.

I hadn’t seen the Chex Mix Guy in more than a year. He was smaller than I remembered, in every way.
Gone was the cheerful, funny man who brought us twelve posts-worth of entertainment. Heartbreak had made him cynical, filled with career ambition and little else.
One thing I’ll note for my future self: When I told him about falling to the bottom in my martial arts classes, he said, “That gives you a goal to aim for. Work your way back to the top.” That was thoughtful of him.
When we were through catching up, he grabbed his phone to choose the next song for his air buds. I took two steps and turned back around.
“This is weird,” I said.
“What is?”
“This is the last time I will ever see or speak to you.”
“You’re not going to work out here?”
“This was just a trial. Turns out, my physical therapy is inside of a different gym. I might as well go there.”
“All right. High five then.” He put his hand up, I slapped him five, and he immediately went back to his phone.
I walked out of the gym without looking back and was rattled for the rest of day.
If any of you are into “good vibes” or whatever, please send some his way.
The next day, Sensei said, “So you finished your gym trial. Are you going to sign up there?”
“That place has been burned for me. I’m never going back.”
I explained my conversation with his predecessor, the first “blog star,” calling him a sad shell of a formerly cheerful funny human being.
Sensei responded: “Four out of five orthopedic surgeons agree that talking to a sad shell of a formerly cheerful funny human is bad for an injured foot.”
Aren’t you glad we have Sensei now? đ
Also, Sensei and I had a debate about whether or not I can use the gym my physical therapy is in even though I don’t have a membership. This gym is immense. I walked out of the PT office, gazed at all those rows of lovely treadmills, cycles, and stair climbers, and wondered…
I was already IN the gym, past the front desk, and there were scores of empty machines. But I didn’t feel right jumping on one without a membership.
“I guarantee you the gym is getting paid by the physical therapy company. And you or your insurance are paying the PT company. So, one way or another, you are paying the gym. The machines were empty anyway. You would be costing them one hundredth of a penny to use their machines.”
I wasn’t entirely sold. My options are:
- Get a membership. (Probably very expensive given the caliber of this place.)
- Use the machines without a membership because what’s the harm?
- Ask at the desk if, as a PT patient, I’m allowed to exercise there for free, or if there’s a discount. (I already asked the PT people. They had no idea.)
If there’s a fee, I’ll probably not join. So option 3 runs the risk of them saying no. Option 2, should I get “caught,” though that seems unlikely, means I’d have to ask forgiveness rather than permission. Still seems rather shifty.
What would you do?
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Option 3b – why not ask your physical therapist because perhaps they can give you a skinny as to how best to leverage the system?
Good one Sensei! And good vibes to CMG! Well, really good vibes to everyone!! ⤠⤠â¤
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I guess I could have mentioned that I did ask the physical therapist. He says he has no idea.
Sensei is a funny one for sure. He brings little bits of joy, so I guess I’ll keep him around. đ Our time is limited, however. Once we all earn our black belts, I imagine the fun is over.
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Right! Perhaps you can make up a few colors in between to put off the inevitable! Or then it’ll be time for Joe to learn?
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Yes, there’s still Joe to train up. That buys us some time.
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I’d go with option3. I wouldn’t feel right just jumping on the equipment, even if I could get away with it. Alas…conscience!
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That’s how I feel too, BCM.
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I’d probably figure out a way to do it at home. I get really annoyed when stuff I have to do requires spending more money. Any bartering available? Trade your books for membership?
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Hahaha. My books aren’t worth that much, but thanks, Jacqui. đ I probably will just exercise at home.
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That’s odd that your PT doesn’t know. It seems like a reasonable question. If I’m being perfectly honest, I think I’d try option 2… but maybe not since I tend to be a rule follower.
Sorry about the CMG. I hope his life turns around for him.
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Just jumping on a machine didn’t feel right to me. Funny that Sensei had no compunction on the matter. I can follow his logic, but it still seems a little shady.
Thanks for your concern about the CMG. I appreciate it, Janis.
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he’s looking pretty smiley and cheery and so are you Betsy. Just exercise and see how long it takes for them to notice.. You can always pay.. no? The do say carry on and beg for forgiveness later.. đĽš
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The responses on this are so varied! An interesting question I’ve landed on once again. Thanks for your input, Cindy. đ
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go with your gut!
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Good plan. đ
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â¤ď¸đ
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I’d go with 3
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I believe you would. And I would too. đ
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I believe the first post I ever read here was about Chex Mix Guy, so I suspected him from your title. He is not how I pictured him, but they never are, are they? Lol!
I would be nervous using the equipment, but Iâm curious: when you enter the building, donât they ask for your pass or whatever gyms do these days? Iâm just wondering how they keep track of whoâs who?
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I imagine no one would be able to guess someone who looks like this.
I went up to the desk and said I was there for PT. She told me where it was (past the cycle room and to the left). I was worried I’d get lost. (I did not.) It’s weird because everyone could just say that once they know it’s there, but, of course, that would be lying. Since I was wearing a boot, that probably helped. I wonder if they care about keeping track. They look like they’re doing quite well for themselves.
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Hi! Sending good vibes out for all y’all and great you got a photo and does this make post 13?
Anyhow – I would double check with the welcome desk – they might just need you to sign in
Oh and hope you heal to 100% soon
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Yes and thank you to everything you said, PH!
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đ
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Iâd go with number three. I learned at a young age to follow the rules. Whenever I didnât, I always got caught by my mother.
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Hahahaha, Jill. And since my mother reads my blog, I’d better do as you suggest. đ Thanks, Jill. đ
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Is there an option 4 of getting the PT/physician to request you get access to the gym for at least a while to help build up your strength? Part of recovery for overachievers?
Also, I found it âcoincidentalâ that you posed behind a trash can that hid your foot⌠Happenstance or intestinal, one wonders⌠đ¤
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By “Happenstance or intestinal,” I think you mean intentional. Hahahaha. Ah, great one! It was totally accidental. I have no reason to hide my boot.
I may ask my physical therapist. Maybe asking the PT receptionist was the wrong approach. He could request on my behalf, but the exercises he’s having me do really aren’t ones to be done on machines, so it would be a bit of a stretch. I’ll probably ask the gym people. The worst they say is no, and I get home sooner. đ
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Oops đ Silly autocorrect! Yes, I meant intentional and I didnât spot the bait-and-switch đ
I think itâs worth asking your PT or physician since youâre a jujitsu ninja and want to get back to peak form asap, and so youâd like to take on extra work at the gym: you said you needed to build up muscle, no? If they say no to being an overachiever, what have you lost?
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Being an overachiever. Ha. I wonder if I’ve ever been accused of that before.
I’ll find out about the other thing and let you know. đ
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Option 3! I’m way too honest.
And now I’m off to read about this Chex Mix Guy…
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I hope you go to page two and scroll to the bottom so as to read them in order. It’s too bad they come up in reverse order. If you do read them, let me know what you think! And I’m also in the option 3 camp.
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I did read them in order! I stopped commenting so as not to annoy you. đ
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Never annoyed by comments! I love comments, Chel. But it was funny… me scratching my head… paperclip… paperclip… It was fun to reread that silly memory with my son. I’m glad you provided the opportunity for that reminder. đ
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I am sending lot of positive energy to both you & Chex Mix Guy!
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Thanks so much, Ju-Lyn! I knew I could count on you. đ
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I feel sad for the guy, though. Heartbreak does change you, and I can’t blame him for it. At that point, I surmise that he just wants to be left alone so he kep his interactions with you rather short. No time for fun on his part.
Whereas most people take a path of nihilism, at least he directed his emotions towards something productive.
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I feel bad for him too, Monch, but he did not keep his remarks short. What you surmise may be partially true, but Iâll just say that I wish he had told me less.
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I would ask the gym if PT patients can use the facilities. If they say “no,” you have nothing to lose cause you are not using it now. If the answer is “yes,” you will have peace of mind.
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Absolutely agree, John. Thanks for your input. đ
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Option 3, for sure. Or I really like Endless Weekend’s option 4–have your PT therapist ask on your behalf. In any case, since you’re there for PT, might as well try to take advantage of a vast room of unoccupied exercise equipment.
And that’s not how I pictured CMG. Too bad he’s gotten a bit cynical, but I think we all go through periods like that. Maybe he just got passed over for a promotion. Or they raised his rates at the gym. I like his comment, though, about how you now have something to aim for, seeing as how you’re now at the bottom of the class.
Wait, when you are able to jui-jitsu again, that’ll be a whole lot more posts about it đ
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Yes on 3 or 4. I’ll ask and see.
How did you picture CMG? I have little doubt that NO one pictured him like that. But isn’t it fun for those of you who have been with me the longest to get to see him after all these years? I guess it was a fun encounter in that regard. I wish I could say he was “off” for one of the reasons you suggest, but mostly just heartbreak, from the same woman, multiple times. đŚ The dude needs prayer. There, I said it. The “p” word!
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Oh gosh — I need to catch up about Chex Mix Guy….
I loved reading the comments — so much fun and such variety! I really like what EW suggested…have your PT do some of the ‘leg work’ (waahhhhaaaaa) for you. Oh…it’s early. Too soon to be slap happy…but then again, EW’s “intestinal/intentional” fun had me rolling…just because. Love, love, love! đ¤Łđđ¤Ł
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EW is fantastic–in so many ways! đ But your leg work comment was right up there. đ
If you do explore the Chex Mix Guy saga, I hope you’ll scroll to the bottom of page two to start with the first one. That first encounter was really the best. That funny clever man–I hope part of him is still that way somewhere inside.
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Thanks for the tip — I will do just that! đđđ
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I’d probably go with #3, even knowing the answer might not be what I want to hear. I’d then figure out how to exercise at home since I’m a cheapskate. Plus for me, the closest gym is 90 minutes away. They should pay ME for the hassle, right?
And sorry the Chex Guy was the shell of the man he once was. Clearly he didn’t realize what a deeply profound relationship he had with you. Hehe. Sensei is more your style anyway – he’s got a few more tools in the shed. đ
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I agree with option 3. Ninety minutes away? Wow. They should totally pay you for that! đ
I like to think that, back in the day, I brought the CMG some happiness. People are in our lives for a reason or a season, right? I guess this is the Sensei season. I just hope it ends better.
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Yup. Your visits were probably the best part of his day back in the day. đ
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Not to sound immodest, but, it’s possible.
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I’d go with posing as a fitness instructor and just hanging out at the gym all day till the staff recognises me. Once they assume I work there, I’ll basically be a free member foreverrrr.
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Hahahaha! I like how you think, Stuart! đ
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Man, if Sensei started eating Chex Mix, he’d be twice the blog star he is today! You should bring him some.
Me, I’d just walk outside. I hate paying for gyms when the streets are free, yo.
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Part of this post that I edited out for length was the conversation where I asked Sensei to guess who I saw at the gym. First he guessed, “One of your Jiu-Jitsu buddies?” Then I told him it was the first blog star. “The guy who got you Chex Mix?” I was surprised he remembered. I surmise he must be at least familiar with Chex Mix, or he would’ve fumbled for the name of the particular snack.
Walks are lovely, but they do nothing for my arms and abs. Now if I were to take a walk in a park, which ended in a yard with a hibachi, a drink, and card games… That would be worthy exercise. Especially if I later got to walk over a decorative bridge.
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Bless your sensei for giving his humourous wisdom and sending some light into an unsettling encounter. Sometimes connections turn out to be just for a while – your friend has decided to go his own way, sadly.
Regarding the exercise, I would go with 3. I am a stickler for the rules, which annoys many but I can’t change that side of me. Take care, Betsy. xx
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Friends for a reason or a season, as they say. Just wish our final encounter (assuming it was indeed that) was more pleasant.
Option 3 was my plan all along. I’m glad so many of you good people are reinforcing that decision. đ
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Sorry to learn about the Chex Mix Guy’s heartbreak and that it has taken all the joy from his life. My son is also a different person after his divorce.
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Oh, that’s very sad. I hope your son finds healing and peace and happiness again.
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It’s my hope, too, Betsy.
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Hugs!
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You know that Sensei is a truly wise person. There is nothing sadder than a sad Chex Mix guy.
About the gym – you could just tell them that if they don’t let you use the machines that you’ll send Sensei over to explain them why you should be allowed to use them.
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And you know what’s funny? Sensei is a member of that gym!
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There you go – an insider. Even better.
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I said to him, my PT is during the day, and you only go at night, right? So I won’t have the DISpleasure of running into you? He acknowledged I was correct.
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If the gym has good classes, I’d say join. If you’re into classes, that is. You’ll be there for PT so you can kill two birds with one stone.
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An excellent point. đ
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Iâm normally a hardcore rule followerâŚso I would probably ask the front desk if itâs ok to work out after pt because your pt thinks it could help the strength training
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Roger that, LA. And I meant to do so today, but the front desk was hopping.
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đ
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Chex Mix Guy!!! Oh the way I smiled when I read that. I’m sorry he’s a less happy version of his former salty self.
As for what to do about this gym situation, I dunno. I’d ask for permission to use the machines OR suck it up and get membership. I’m a rule follower when it comes to places where I might get hurt. Just saying, not trying to be negative.
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It is so so fun for me to have “old timers” recognize the CMG and react the way you did. Well, you’re the only one who reacted the way you did (which was the best), so thank you so much for that. No one else except my long-timers understand the significance of that encounter. I appreciate you feeling my sadness too.
I meant to ask the desk this morning, but it was too busy there. Chances are, it will be too rich for my blood, and I’ll just exercise at home. Which is fine too. My heart’s not set on this.
Thanks for your thoughts on this, AB.
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Well leave it to me to be the only one to react the way I did. Keep Ally Weird was an alternate title for my blog. Z-D wanted me to use that one.
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You reacted perfectly, and not weirdly at all. Fun title idea, but I’m glad you didn’t use it. The “Keep ___ Weird” phrase is becoming cliche, it seems. I’ve heard it quite a bit lately.
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I have too. Fortunately I didn’t listen to him. đ
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Let’s just Keep Z-D Weird instead. đ
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YES! Although he does a good job of that on his own…
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Haha! Nice. đ
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Sounds like Chex Mix Guy was there for therapy too. Lol
When I needed therapy I bought the machines I needed, however, I have room in my basement for them. I found it cheaper to buy them than pay for a gym membership and the family could use them too.
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I wish I could’ve been more therapeutic for him, but I doubt I had that effect. If I had another chance, I would try to say something helpful.
I wish I had a basement for that very reason! As is, no space for workout equipment here.
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Weirdness, Betsy. You referred to CMG in one of your last comments to me and I had NO idea who you were talking about because I missed out on the early days of Betsy’s blog. So I moved on. Then this post led with “Chex Mix Guy” and I STILL didn’t make the connection… until the reader comments. CMG! Ah, my curiousity is sated. Not that I was losing sleep over a single detail from a single comment from a single blog post or anything.
Go with Option 1 or 3, but only because I can’t get out of the way of my own conscience. Example: my gym has a full-service spa, beyond the check-in counter, open to the public. All you have to say is “I’m here for a massage” and they wave you past the counter without ID. So sure, after the massage I could mix anonymously with members and help myself to a free workout. But I wouldn’t, because Jiminy Cricket rests heavily on my shoulder. And heck, who wants to work out after a massage anyway?
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Did I mention him in a previous comment to you? I probably didn’t know which post we were commenting on. I get confused. Well, if you did go to the trouble of catching up on the whole sordid tale of the CMG, you could appreciate how he USED to be fun and funny. I’m not sure who that guy I ran into is anymore. Very sad.
Yeah, I’m opting for asking permission. Or, doing option 4 and simply not working out there at all. My conscience would also play at me like a misnamed grasshopper, because isn’t Jiminy actually a grasshopper? I thought crickets were smaller and black?
And you’re also right: you’d want to get the free work-out first, THEN get the massage to wear away your guilt. Haha. đ But I also wonder if they don’t check for a membership because they don’t really care. Surely they must know some people would “game” the system. Maybe having more bodies in the room makes their gym look more popular. Who knows.
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Chex mix guy! How nice to finally “meet” him! In terms of the gym, I like to exercise at home–over the years, I’ve collected the treadmill, the elliptical machine, free weights, and an exercise bike–and if I fall off them or look silly or wear the shirt with the sweat rings in the armpits, no one cares–no one sees–no one knows. đ
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I wish I had space for my own equipment. That would be so nice. Ah well. Sweat rings in the armpits. Haha.
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Hey, CMG helped you in your times of your mad CM cravings, the least you can do is join that gym and occasionally be a sympathetic ear!
Remember, that guy held onto dozens of discontinued CM bags for you. AND he withstood your relentless CM harassment with grace, aplomb and good cheer! Time to give back, Bets! đ
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I honestly wish that, Mike. I would love to help him out with some free therapy. I’ve been hoping he’d see this post and be like, “What do you mean sad shell of my former self?” But I highly doubt that will happen. My overall impression is that he no longer gives a sh*t about me and does not want me in his life. And that’s fine, but also too bad because he has such lousy, bad-influence friends.
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Huh. I didn’t read it that way at all. To me it seemed like he was a little surprised that you had no plans to come back to the gym. Then, when he found out you weren’t returning, he emotionally shut down and acted like he wasn’t disappointed. Some guys do that.
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Hmm. Slightly possible, but I doubt it. Thanks for the thought, though, Mike. đ
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#3. and I know I’m late to this post…but did you find out anything?
đŚ about cmg. Maybe he was having a super duper bad day and just couldn’t get out of his head in the moment he was with you. Sending him all kinds of good vibes.
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Hello, CM!!! I haven’t asked at the gym desk yet, but I will when I see they’re free.
I wish that were true about the CMG, just an off day, but that’s not the impression I got. He seemed to think he was fine, but I could see how he’s changed. đŚ
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