Quotes from my mother’s letters to the girls:
When Grandpa rakes leaves, he builds a little fire. The deer come out of the woods and stand around the fire warming up. I take them cups of hot chocolate. Yesterday I taught them how to make s’mores. They roast the marshmallows on their antlers.
Then in the next letter:
We have several inches of snow and it’s cold. The deer are unhappy. They miss the bon fires. One deer tapped on the window and waved a hoof for me to come out. But I don’t have a fur coat. So then he put his hoof up to his ear like, “Call me.”
Now this is important: Don’t ever ever give your phone number to a deer. He will call you at 2 a.m. That’s when deer like to eat and say, “Hey the berry bush at the Smiths is really tasty. It would be so good with s’mores.”
You just have to ignore deer.
That’s my mother folks. She has more great stories like this sent to the grandkids in her book, Heading South: Tales from the RV Trail. If you want a fun, entertaining read, check it out.
What’s the most fun memoir, travel, or comedy book you’ve read? If you want to get all three in one, try Heading South. 😉
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The most fun comedic book (originally published as 3 vols.) I’ve read I think is still “Illuminatus!” by Robert Shea & Robert Anton Wilson. It does take getting over the hump though, before it changes from a headache to fun. It had long passages that made me LOL continuously. I was introduced separately & became friendly with both the authors before their deaths. The book has been especially influential in Hollywood, though usually without explicit acknowledgment.
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How interesting!
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Well, she is right, a berry bush at 2:00 am would be very tasty with s’mores. Good to hear she’s passing this wisdom on to a new generation – a lot of people don’t know about deers and their telephone usage…
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Deer on their phones is an increasing problem. It’s why deer-car fatalities are up 20%. Deer are too busy checking their facebook pages to pay attention when they cross the street.
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Finally, someone agrees with me!
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Hard to disagree with someone so wise, largely thanks to your father, I’m sure.
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THIS is priceless 🙂
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🙂
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What kind of chocolate do deer like with their s’mores? Hershey’s is okay, but if you really want to impress the in-laws, you gotta have Godiva. Seriously. 😀
I heard their favorite party game is the ring toss. The only difference is they throw a whole bunch of rings in the air and whoever catches the most on their antlers wins!
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That would be so fun to witness, but, like Rudolph, I never get invited to the (rein)deer games.
The real question is, do they deserve Godiva? Were they responsible with their smart phones?
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I’ll add this book to my list. I always enjoy a good memoir with a light touch. The most memorable funny adult travel memoirs I’ve read are by J. Maarten Troost. The first one is The Sex Lives of the Cannibals. It had me in stitches on an airplane, with passengers giving me the side eye.
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What a hilarious title! I’m glad it’s a comedy to match; otherwise, I’m not sure I’d want to know!
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She’s so wise. I don’t trust deer either, mostly because I view them in the same way my dog views squirrels. Really, could you guys not have left me more than one green bean in the garden this summer? And don’t try to tell me it wasn’t you. I saw the hoof prints.
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Yes, such thieves! They have no moral code.
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Between you and me the coyote musk is coming back out this spring (the professional collection of which by the way has to be one of the weirdest jobs out there).
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Oh deer. Ha! I didn’t even realize my pun until after I wrote it. But, yes, truly a weird occupation. How do you sugarcoat that one on a first date? Isn’t there urine you could use too? I’m not sure which would be the better job description.
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Pretty sure that’s one of those times it is completely understandable to say, eh a little this, a little that.
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Haha, yes. Save the details for the fourth date at least.
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Ah ha! So, this is where u got your writing bug from??? Mom! ❤
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Where would we be without our moms? Besides nonexistent, that is.
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I loved your mom’s book! She’s got a great sense of humor as well as wonderful writing chops.
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Yes, and since these deer stories weren’t in the book, I had to share them with the world this way. 🙂
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Your mother sounds like a kick. What a sense of humor.
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To know her is to love her. 🙂
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So the writing apple doesn’t fall far from the tree! Happy New Year! I’m back! lol My first post comes out Monday.
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Welcome back!
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Thanks!!
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Your other sounds like a delightful person and is certainly an imaginative, entertaining writer. Your children must love her. I will check out her book for sure.
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Aunt Beulah, I think you’ll love it. You two would get along well.
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Cheers to Mom’s sense of humor!
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Indeed. She’s fun. 🙂
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This made me smile
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🙂 Me too.
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