Mar7

Comma Conundrum Continued

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Some of you really got into the comma discussion from my last post. Some others of you are thinking, “Where are the bruise pictures?”

BTW, funny thing about that wannabe black eye post, it earned likes from three CBD dispensaries and one counseling service. LOL. I’m okay, people. Really.

But getting back to the Comma Conundrum…

This isn’t me, but she gets it. (Thanks to Robin Higgins on Pixabay)

Here’s what your votes added up to, including a write-in from my mother via text. And, yes, friends, I do know the elementary comma conjunction rule when what follows is an independent clause.

1a At first there was nothing then a slight tickling as though from fur. TWO VOTES

1b At first there was nothing, then a slight tickling as though from fur. 14 VOTES

2a Even if I told them about the van, I didn’t know where it was headed, besides north. TWO VOTES

2b Even if I told them about the van, I didn’t know where it was headed besides north. 12 VOTES

What did the editor say?

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Mar6

Okay, you writer types. Let’s talk editing.

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Okay, you writer types. Let’s talk editing.

A funny thing happened when I got feedback from the “kick-start editor” for my debut novel, Wish I Was Here. She checks the first 20 pages of your manuscript to give you an idea of stuff to look out for in the rest of your book. Mainly, it was all about the commas.

This cracked me up because commas were Mark’s primary concern when he did a run-through also. I specifically remember him adding a comma before “then” somewhere.

This lady? “No commas before then unless what follows is a complete thought.”

I understand the mechanics of that, sure, but what about when there’s a natural pause where the comma would go?

I googled comma chameleon because I knew there had to be something like this in existence.

I’d love your guys’ take on The Great Comma Debate. Here are two examples. Please vote 1 a or b and 2 a or b.

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Mar2

You should see the other guy

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Given that our recent focus in Jiu-Jitsu has been all things lower extremities: heel hooks, ankle locks, knee bars, and now toe holds, I’m not surprised by how colorful my skin has become from the knee down. This adds to the near-omnipresent arm bruises.

But one night before class, I considered how cool it would be to have a black eye. I’m all about new experiences; why not this one? I’ve thought this a handful of times, so the only reason it’s unique now, is that I sort of got my wish.

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Feb23

Book launch for Jacqui Murray’s Endangered Species

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Book launch for Jacqui Murray’s Endangered Species

And now for something a little different!

The blog community has many authors, and I’m happy to support my long-time blog buddy, Jacqui, and her book, Endangered Species, Book 1 of her Savage Land prehistoric trilogy. 

From Jacqui: Savage Land explores how two bands of humans survived one of the worst natural disasters in Earth’s history, when volcanic eruptions darkened the sky, massive tsunamis crossed the ocean in crushing waves, and raging fires burned the land. Both tribes considered themselves apex predators. Neither was. That crown belonged to Nature, and she was intent on washing the blight of man from her face.

From me: Duuuuuuuuuuuuddddddeeeee!!!

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Feb16

Talking Music with Surfer Dude/Instructor the Mind Reader

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Talking Music with Surfer Dude/Instructor the Mind Reader
My neighbor, Subie, on left, Surfer Dude on right, saying, “Shout out to Ilsa’s blog readers!” [Not really, but how awesome would that have been?]

One night for rolls at Jiu-Jitsu, a song by Pierce the Veil called “Bulls in the Bronx” played. During a flamenco interlude, I couldn’t help but stop rolling with Surfer Dude to “dance” while kneeling. Not missing a beat, he pulled on a prim and proper face like a flamenco guitarist and pretended to play. It was priceless.

Back to rolling, which always involves laughter when I’m with SD (and most people, but especially SD), I said, “Maybe we’re just having too much fun,” a second before that line was sung.

He smiled and fist bumped me with our sparring gloves on.

Later, I was rolling with Balloon Man when “Ride the Lightning” by Metallica played. I ALMOST pulled the same stunt by telling Balloon Man (not going to abbreviate that one), “Now it’s time to die,” to align with the song.

I didn’t have the nerve. I told SD about it later. He said,

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Feb6

The funny parts

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The funny parts

My Jiu-Jitsu Instructor asked if anyone had a question. I raised my hand and asked if you could sneak a choke in from North/South when someone was turtling. (You follow all that?) “Money” was nearest, so Instructor demonstrated on him.

When he asked if there were any more questions, I asked what to do if the person’s turtle is so tight you can’t slip an arm in.

So, Instructor demonstrated with Money again, break dancing on top of him before ultimately sneaking in the choke. Meanwhile, Money’s getting his rear repeatedly handed to him.

“Any other questions?”

“I’m trying to think of one just so I can see you mess with Money some more,” I said.

He laughed. Money looked at me and laughed too. Then Instructor turned to him and said, “Next time I’ll demo with her and let you watch.”

To add a picture, here’s me taking this dude’s head off with my leg.

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Feb1

How I accidentally uncovered a car thief

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How I accidentally uncovered a car thief
This wasn’t the thief. Just a funny sight another day while driving.

My beloved little red piece of junk car that I’ve had since Hubby and I were dating, finally incurred a repair that cost more than the car is worth.

So, I looked at a carport’s worth of cars for sale on a variety of online platforms. We made a list of the possibilities, their pros and cons, narrowed it down, and I started contacting owners.

“Chuck,” texted to meet near a gas station. It was a decent car, fair price, very clean.

“Why are you selling it?” I asked.

“My wife is pregnant with our third, so we want a bigger car,” he said, while scratching his face with a non-ring-bearing hand.

Doesn’t necessarily mean anything, I thought.

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Jan25

This is real stress

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This is real stress

The deadline looms for turning in my final-final manuscript of Wish I Was Here to the publisher. The feedback I’ve gotten from beta readers has been good, but that’s mostly been men in their fifties. Clearly, I need to expand my friend group.

But the harsh reality is, I should get the reaction of my target audience: teenage girls, especially ones who are well-read.

Gulp.

I needed to let my own children read this thing.

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Jan21

Dance Battle Jiu-Jitsu

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Dance Battle Jiu-Jitsu

It was time to roll. Instructor turned on music.

And I started dancing. 

Typically, for this to happen, I have to be very comfortable with the people around me. So me dancing at Jiu-Jitsu… What the heck was that?!

For starters, it was, at best, some weird kick thing reminiscent of Elaine from Seinfeld.

I was her stunt double for this scene.

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Jan15

Insulting Thoughtful One

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Insulting Thoughtful One
This is a now slightly-outdated picture of my Jiu-Jitsu card. Thoughtful One’s is far more impressive.

Thoughtful One arrived after me, and since I saw him coming, I grabbed his card from the box when I grabbed mine. His card was full save a few Fight Simulation boxes on the bottom.

I handed him his card and said, “Nice and full.”

“What?” he said, tossing his card onto the bench in a manner that made me think, “Ooookay.”

“Your card. It’s practically full.”

“Oh.” He relaxed. “I thought you were commenting on my stomach. I appreciate the honesty, but…”

I laughed. “Yeah, man, big breakfast or something?”

I would never be rude to any of these people, if not for self-preservation, for basic human decency, and because none of them give reason for rudeness.

~~~

When the gym had a Christmas party, I brought my son so he could play with the Little Instructors again like on our two park days. Thoughtful One brought his wife and, after introducing me to her, added, “She’s a novelist.”

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