May2

My last Jiu-Jitsu class

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My last Jiu-Jitsu class

… before my old schedule was up.

Did I freak any of you out? Talk about click bait.

But it WAS the last class for Blue Belt before he left for four years of optometry school out of state. There were lots of hugs, group or otherwise. Instructor, trying not to get teary-eyed, reminisced about Blue Belt’s first day, showing up in pajamas saying, “You teach Jiu-Jitsu?! Cool. I want to try it!”

Instructor said, “I knew he’d become a stud.”

Pirate bought him a farewell gift of one of the new green Jiu-Jitsu shirts, specific to our gym, so he won’t forget where he came from, I suppose.

Unfortunately, Blue Belt looks utterly insane in this picture. He also has his American flag mouthguard in still, which isn’t helping. On the other hand, I actually look decent for a post-class photo!

It was sad losing a “family” member who was one of the earliest students since the gym’s founding in 2020. Surfer Dude, then Balloon Man, then Blue Belt have been there the longest.

But back to ME. I was sad too, okay?! It was my last class with the old 3-per-week schedule.

It was also a great class.

Some weeks ago, I reflected that arm barring people is hard. Everyone is stronger than I am, so they can generally pull their arm away or twist it so the “break” can’t happen.

I’d also been thinking how impossible Pirate is to submit. His ankle is as large, probably larger, than my biceps. (I noted that when I grabbed his ankle. He didn’t disagree.) He also slips out of my chokes–MY chokes! The person with the great limbs for choking! I suspect the bald head makes it easier for him.

So how was I supposed to get this guy? Managing it would be an amazing accomplishment.

Then…

Remember this move? It’s a form of arm bar. What I did to Pirate was similar.

Most of my body was off the mat hanging from Pirate.

And he tapped.

“For real?” I said as I released him.

He nodded.

“This is monumental.”

He smiled. “I can lift your whole body off the ground with one arm, normally, but the way you had me, I couldn’t do anything. Then you put your hips into it. I was done.”

Wow.

“You were patient with it, too,” he said. “You even put up with my sweat on your face.”

I laughed. That was true, and I wiped my cheek with my sleeve. I’ve been doing this for far too long to be bothered by that.

My next goal is to submit Surfer Dude. I know, I know. But I didn’t think submitting Pirate could be done, either, so who knows?

Before the last roll this night, I was getting water when I heard Instructor call, “I get you next, Ilsa!” He must not have seen me nod, because he repeated it with even greater enthusiasm. Maybe he enjoys rolling with me? More likely, it was a warning as in, “Mwuahaha. You’re going down, clown.”

He would never say that. He still might think it, though.

He is tough, of course, but he’s also the most fun to roll with. I also feel pretty good because I am not so easily submittable, even for him. Plus, because I now know more, I’m better at spotting what’s coming.

He’s trying to isolate my arm.

“Nope,” I said and pulled my arm away.

He’s going for a mount triangle.

“Nope.” I quickly scooted out of that.

Old picture of a mount triangle

Next, he was after a heel hook, so I bent my knee and triangled my legs to protect them. He kept reaching for my ankle, and I kept moving my leg away.

“I wanted that leg,” he said with a laugh, finally giving up.

“But I don’t want you to have it,” I said.

I made him laugh several times. For instance, I had said, “I must choke you.” When a bit later he instead choked me, I said, “You need to learn your pronouns. I said, ‘I choke you, not you choke me.'”

Another time he said he did the “fat man roll.”

“I am insulted,” I said.

“No, it’s because what I did is a lazy roll, but I couldn’t do anything else.”

Later, when he flipped me with ease, I said I needed to work on being a fat man. Another laugh.

I congratulated him on something, slipping my choke, probably. He said, “Thanks. I’ve been doing this for a couple years.”

“A couple.” Ha! That made me laugh.

At one point, he said, “Doink.” I looked up to see him smiling after I had swung my foot over his head.

“Did I just kick you?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m so sorry. Did it hurt?”

“A little, but it’s fine.” He was more laughing about it than anything. This was a switch from the night I was being tested for blue belt, and he told me to be careful not to kick people in the head. “I need to be sure you’re a safe training partner,” he had said then.

This night I guess was more low-key. Also, perhaps he felt this was fair payback for the shove he gave me that made my ribs slam into his upturned knees.

“Ooof,” I said. It hurt for a second.

“You okay?” he asked.

“Yes.” I was.

I held out for a goodly long time before he got me in some complicated painful position. When I tapped, I said, “What fresh hell was that?”

“It’s called the electric chair,” he said.

“Of course it is.”

If I don’t keep coming to these classes, I won’t learn “octopus guard” and how to “escape from Alcatraz.” I don’t know who comes up with these names, but I like them.

Sigh.

The best part about blogging about Jiu-Jitsu is I can justify the time by saying I’m working on the memoir. Hubby asked what I did today. I said, “Worked on the memoir.”

“So you have a new blog post up?”

Nothing gets past this man.

Last Q: Convicted murderer Gary Gilmore’s final words before execution by firing squad inspired ad man Dan Wieden’s 1988 creation, this famous three-word slogan: “Just do it.”

New Q: This isn’t trivial. This is a “would you rather” I came up with. So:

Would you rather have your dream car (fastest, coolest, most expensive, whatever) or always get green lights?

I thought of this while stuck at a red light. There are far too many stoplights in this town.

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82 responses »

  1. Hello there- I am glad you shared that it was a US themed mouthpiece because I was puzzled about what kind of teeth problems were going on – hahahah
    and congrats on optometry school – and adjust8ing to the next changes with family and Jiu-Jitsu
    side note – my two grandkids started martial arts and might try Jiu-Jitsu in the fall. My step-daughter chose martial arts for them and so far it is going well.

    and had to smile about the memoir and Jiu-Jitsu blog posts – but the truth is that they can overlap and be one in the same – because your memoir will have a lot of the fun content you share here (as you obviously know)
    oh and as usual – the action photos make the post come to life

    Liked by 2 people

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      • so far, they have enjoyed getting those first stripes.
        and please don’t hold me to this – but I might be taking a few classes myself –
        I tried some in 2002 when my boys were little – but didn’t care for it.
        however, there is no yoga in my immediate area and I keep walking by a martial arts studio so I am pondering a short trial run – I will keep you posted

        Liked by 1 person

      • Oooh, how intriguing! What kind of martial arts is it? Fine, not holding you to it, but I will remember and check back in eventually! 😉

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      • well to be honest, I do not really have a desire for a dream car because I have already had mine – long story – but I was silly in my early 20s and bought a car that was stupid in hindsight – impulse buy and well – right now – my hubs and I share three vehicles and all are kind of heart’s desire – including a low milage but older king ranch f150

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      • Read it, loved it. Awesome you got the pics. This: Seeing so many green lights on the first day of a brand new year – – felt pretty darn good!

        So, did you notice a happier 2015? That whole event would make me smile for sure.

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  4. I’m always amazed you talk about being twisted into painful pretzel positions and choked with such utter glee. I can not even imagine a world where I would feel the same.
    As for the question, give me the fast and sexy sports car … I’ll blow through all those red lights before they get to red.
    😉

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    • Great answer, River! Priorhouse commented that she’d take the dream car and not mind the reds because she’d enjoy the hum of the idling engine. I would add that I wouldn’t mind the admiring looks at my car from other drivers. 😛 But driving fast is my default, so tough call.

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  7. Along with the others, I was wondering what was going on with his teeth. From a distance (ie, small picture on your blog post) I figured he had white trash teeth. So thanks for clarifying that 😀

    I do hope that reducing your classes means you don’t get hurt as much. You obviously have a fantastic group and I’m kind of jealous (as jealous as an introvert can be about “group” things anyway) but all I can think about is you in a walker going to your kids highschool graduation, hahaha 🙂

    I’ll take green lights every single time! Cars mean nothing to me and my idea of a “sexy” car is a brand new subara legacy wagon. The more mature I’m getting, the slower I’m driving. Soon enough I’ll be my dad and go exactly 2 miles above the speed limit 😀 so a brand new subaru would suit me to a t. I’m assuming you will answer the question in your next post?

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  8. Yet another “vote” for mouth guard clarification! Thanks, Booky.

    At least I’m not getting new injuries, right? Scrapes, bumps, bruises, and soreness don’t count. They just make me feel good for having worked hard. Yeah, not too keen on the walker idea. Eleven years until my last one graduates. We’ll see if I make it to 19 years before the walker. I can have one for his college graduation, right? 😉

    I’m also an introvert not crazy about group things, but we don’t talk a ton, and when we do, it’s about Jiu-Jitsu. I don’t need to worry about making small talk. That’s a plus, anyway. 🙂

    I figured that anyone not into cars would have too easy a time with this. I think when I’m older and hopefully not in a rush to get somewhere, I’ll enjoy driving slower. Honestly, I didn’t know my answer, but some other people are swaying me. Yes, I’ll let you know next time. 🙂

    And btw, thank you again for finding my blog and being a stalwart reader and commenter despite me being a rubbish reciprocater. :/

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    • I’m assuming this was in reply to me? It showed up on it’s own. WP comment chaos strikes again! (this happens ALL the time on my blog and on several others I regularly comment on)

      I zoomed in since you mentioned America and sho’nuff, there was the stars and stripes, grinning away 😀

      Looking forward to your careful and well planned out answer to the car vs lights question!

      no worries. I never follow someone I’m not interested in. If you write fun posts and will reply to my comments on your blog, that’s all I ask. I never expect someone to follow me back just because I follow them. That way lies madness! You concentrate on your blog and just keep putting out posts 😀

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      • Or it could have been me? I definitely “sho’nuff” hit reply this time, in case I hadn’t last time.

        “careful and well planned out answer”? It’s like I have a reputation for being careful and well planned with my writing!

        Okay, yes, of course I do. I just wasn’t sure if that was obvious. 😉

        Awh, Booky. You’re the sweetest. ❤ And quoting Shakespeare to an English major? Nicely done!

        Liked by 1 person

  9. I once walked past a Jiu-Jitsu class — guess that was my last Jiu-Jitsu class.

    I have a dilemma here. My dream car is one that starts without needing jumper cables and I currently own a car like that so does that mean I only get red lights? Do I have any hope for getting green lights ever again?

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  12. Maybe that sweat acts as lubricant for the bald head. I tested for aquatic lifesaver credentials as a 90 pound teenager ~ drew the struggling double victims of course. They got all the biggest lifeguards to actually oil themselves up for those tests… I got the certificate, but I also got a black eye!

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    • The important thing is that you passed! Well done! And the shiner made for a cool story, I’m sure. And, yes. I didn’t want to say it, but the sweaty bald head is just unfair! 😛

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      • HRH has suggested that several times because I frequently have to gather my wild and unruly hair back up again. I responded, “That would be attractive.” She said, “You’re already married.” I said, “And I’d like to stay that way.” 😛

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  16. I’d go with the all green lights option for sure, and I was worried about his teeth. think you’ll adapt to the 2 classes a week schedule over time and have less injuries and more authoring time

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  17. Apparently your hips are your secret weapon. Keep that in mind next time you get into a jam.

    Gotta go with the dream car. I’m a stop-and-smell-the-roses guy, so red lights don’t really bother me. Especially when I’m idling behind the wheel of my ’75 AMC Gremlin.

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    • Not gonna lie–the hips make a world of difference in Jiu-Jitsu.

      I admire your patience. Also, that’s your dream car? So fun to read people’s answers on that. We’re all so different. Hubby says not to feed the car after midnight. 😉

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      • Okay, you got me there. There is something about supreme dorkiness. I saw a VW van last night on the highway that was full on Grateful Dead painted over. And it was being driven by a blonde 20-year-old woman. So wild. Like she was transported through time, possessed by the spirit of her grandmother? I wish I’d gotten a pic, but I thought of it too late. She was moving slowly, not surprisingly, and we were too far past her. :/

        Liked by 1 person

    • Ah-ha! Autumn with the word play!

      And since you said cops don’t ticket for speeding, I’ve seen two cars pulled over. Maybe it wasn’t for speeding. Who knows? But both times I was like, “Maybe where Autumn lives!” I wish that habit carried south. 😛

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      • Well, LA has SO MANY cars and most local cops don’t even want the hassle of pulling you over. They’re not going to bother unless they can be racist about it or you look like a serious hazard. Simple speeding? LOL. Very different from state cops in other parts of the country.

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  20. Oh, sad to see one of the old crew go. Love the light-hearted sparring with Instructor.

    I think I’d go with green lights. It seems like it would speed things up way more than having a fast car, right?

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    • I agree with your logic regarding the lights. I’m sort of torn on my own question. People have good responses!

      I have since communicated with Blue Belt via Instagram. First, it was accidentally. I meant to write to Little Sister (his). When I apologized, he said he was happy to hear from the Cali crew and not to apologize. Then we determined I should keep him informed of the JJ goings on, so, I’ll keep him looped in best I can. That will keep his spirit alive, in a way. 🙂

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  21. I need to learn “Escape from Alcatraz” just so I can do the move and say I’ve done it! 😆

    That is such an amazing group photo of your crew. I can feel the warmth and camaraderie. And that is an intense mouthguard!

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    • He showed us Escape from Alcatraz briefly as a bonus move that we didn’t get to do. It looked complicated, but now that you’ve said that, dude! You’re so right. I need to get back in there and learn that for the very reason you said.

      “Hey, I escaped from Alcatraz last night. No big deal. Just, you know. {Shrug.}”

      Talk about a missed opportunity!

      I’ll try to amend that. For you, Ab!

      Well, and also for me. But for you too, Ab!

      We are a close-knit crew. Everyone is so nice. Before I joined Master Cycle, Instructor commented to me, “We’ve got a good MC class right now.” He nodded in satisfaction. I know there are some people no longer there. I think he occasionally has to “invite people to leave” if they’re not kind, helpful, supportive, and safe training partners. Everyone left is awesome. I hope I don’t get kicked out for being unsafe. Two kicks to Instructor’s head… that time I kneed a guy in the groin and got a little talking to from Instructor on that guy’s behalf. I never blogged about that. Oofdah. I felt awful.

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  22. I ran errands yesterday (NOT my idea of a fun Saturday), and I was struck by how many stoplights held me up. Maddening. As for the question, definitely green lights. I don’t have a dream car. I hope you don’t regret your reduced schedule, but knowing you can go back up after a month must soften the blow?

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    • Not having a dream car made this question easy for about half of you. Lucky you! I’m still struggling with my own answer. I don’t know that I’ll fully regret the decision so much as just be sad about it. I have a sinking feeling that reducing could be the beginning of the end, or that I’m not going to bump the classes back up. IDK. We’ll see. Hopefully I’m wrong.

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  23. Ahhh! I almost thought this was your last class. 🙂 Glad it’s not true. So, I would rather have the green lights because even with the crappiest car on the road, you can still have the best day ever!

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  25. Oh Betsy, your post was so prescient. Trump is looking to reopen Alcatraz. Good thing you and your crew combat ready! You need to post that tutorial in detail soon so I can be Alcatraz ready too!

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  26. I am amazed by your experiences in your jiu-jitsu classes, enjoy you doing it and not me. As for your question, green lights please. Less fuel wasted, more time to get where I’m going ezpz.

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    • “enjoy you doing it and not me.” Haha! Well, I guess if SOMEone has to do it for you, AB, I’m happy to volunteer.

      Ooh, I like the less fuel wasted aspect. I’m not sure I’d thought of that too. Good call! 🙂

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  27. This was a great post! I love reading about your “matches.” What do you call them? And for you to make Pirate tap was awesome. I hope you get your life balanced and can go back to three days a week at some time. Your love and joy of ju-jitsu shines through in your writing.

    Dream car all day. I don’t mind sitting at stop lights. I’m retired. I’m never in a hurry. Convertible BMW. 🙂

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    • We call them rolls. As far as Pirate tapping–THANK YOU! That was a big deal for me. I appreciate you recognizing that. I did get him once before in a triangle choke, but I often don’t know if it’s legit or if the other person is allowing it. (It may very well have been legit, but I’m not 100% certain.) I at least know this arm bar was legit, and that’s meaningful. The dude is huge, and I took him down. That knowledge makes me feel safer.

      Maye some day I can go back more often. After I finish the sequel, I have to tackle book 3, which will be much harder because I know very little about what’s going to happen in that one. As time consuming as book 2 is, I at least know what all I still have to write. (My gosh, I love book 2 so much! Eeep!)

      I so look forward to some day not being in a hurry. I have great admiration for patient drivers–unless they’re slow drivers. In which case–get out of my way! Haha. 😛 But one day I’ll be one of those people. One day. 🙂

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      • I’m not a slow driver! My motto: 77 on 77!
        77 mph on Interstate 77.

        I love that you love your book! I love my books, too. You have to write to please yourself first. Write what you want to read, and you’ll be happy writing all day long.

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  28. So I originally was thinking of all green lights, but upon further reflection, I want the dream car. My main reason is that getting the dream car would not mean all the lights were red…just normal lights.
    So I choose dream car with normal lights.

    Dodge Viper, red with black stripes.

    Though…since I am no longer in my 20’s, I may actually want a BMW XM. Either blue or green. Easier to get in and out of.

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  29. Have you posted that second photo before? I stared at it a good long while. Figured out the parts that are you and the parts that are him. But the missing head? It’s a mind-blowing optical illusion. For the “would you rather”… no hesitation. Green lights, baby. There’s a curious satisfaction in making it from our house to the gym without a single red (out of about ten). It helps that I don’t have a dream car, even in my mind. I’m too practical for my own good.

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    • I have posted it before, and I get that it’s confusing. 😛 Sometimes when Instructor is… instructing and wearing a matching outfit with his demo partner, it’s a little tricky to follow. Not having a dream car definitely makes the question easier. Unfortunately, I have one, so this was a toughie for me. Being practical is not a bad thing, IMO. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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